A wreck of Hesperis
Friday, June 4, 2010Some time ago, we posted a small collection of what we later decided to call "terms of vegery." We have just released a book-length version -- called, appropriately enough, Terms of Vegery -- as a Kindle book. The cover looks like this:
And here is a little text and some sample photos from the original posting (which have evolved somewhat during the past two years):
In 1968, James Lipton (yes, that James Lipton) published An Exaltation of Larks, an utterly delightful collection of terms of venery -- that is, the words used to describe groups of animals (such as "a pride of lions," "a gaggle of geese," or "a murder of crows"). He also included a set of what we might call venereal puns, supposedly uttered by several professors upon noticing a group of prostitutes. One called them "a jam of tarts," another, "an essay of Trollope's," another, "an anthology of prose," and yet another, "a flourish of strumpets." Lipton continued in a similar vein -- but such pleasures should be reserved for people who still read actual books.
Putting such illuminating diversions aside, my wife Karen and I were wondering why there are so many collective terms for members of the animal kingdom, yet so few for plants. There are only a few, so we (and various friends and relatives we managed to rope in) set out to even the score a bit.
This was the term that started everything:
A Wreck of Hesperis
(with apologies to Longfellow)
Which was soon followed by:
A Flatulence of Beans
An Eddy of Currants
A Nodding of Elders
A Wrath of Grapes
An Alpert of Herbs
And, finally, in keeping with our rapidly-growing obsession:
A Crime of Passionflowers
Terms of Vegery has well over 200 color photos, and is best viewed on Kindle Fire, iPad, or any device that can run Amazon's Kindle apps. It will run on smartphones, but the smaller screen sizes may have minor formatting issues.
33 Comments:
Utterly brilliant, Gary!
Thanks, Cynthia... but these things just make themselves up. Karen and I were shouting them out faster than Karen could write them down (I was driving... and my handwriting, even when I'm not driving, is unreadable by most humans).
You just made my morning with this post.
Now I feel the need to come up with some of my own.
absolutely hilarious Gary; you and Karen have done the English language a great service. I wonder how long it will take them to read the OED?
Michael: Send 'em along! If this ever does turn into a book, I'll be glad to appropriate your ideas (and, naturally, claim them as my own).
Janet: "A great service?" If anything, we've merely added to the world's glut of time-wasters.
Oh wait... isn't "glut of time-wasters" another collective noun? Now see what you've done...
I sent a link to the blog on to my pals James and Kedakai Lipton. She was the illustrator of the book which continues to be sold worldwide to this day.
Tony Hitchcock, HITS Horse Shows
Thanks, Tony... I've been a fan of his book since it first came out (I suppose that must have been obvious).
THis is hilarity! THough I'm going to resist the temptation to start doing this myself now!
It's difficult to stop, once started... despite the pleading looks from those around you to do so.
Thanks - I particularly enjoyed the roberta of Flax, for some reason.
As Hamlet might have mused: aye, there's the shrub.
You could have called this list Puns & Roses, of course...
Well played, Padmavyuha!
I might suggest an alternative of "a Vista of Hostas" in the same spirit of pop culture reference that you have given several of the rest.
Fantastic!
How about a horse of radishes?
--Jim Stevenson
A net of puns?
Flowers were given short shrift, so...
A fire of ashes
A rathbone of basil
An ego of narcissus
A whimper of pines
A blush of pinks
An itch of poison ivy
A touchiness of sensitive plant
A rev-up of speedwell
Al: our first thought was "a la vista of hostas" but I chose "luego" because it was only one word -- but you're right, the cinematic reference is broader than the high school Spanish.
Jim: "a horse of radishes" is sharp and tasty!
Daltona: some of your were addressed in slightly different form (such as "An echo of narcissi," and "A rash of poison ivy") but
"A rathbone of basil" is fantastic.
These are good, and will probably wind up used in similar form
(A whimper of pines, A blush of pinks, A fire of ashes, A rev-up of speedwell).
Something like "A touchiness of sensitive plant" was included in an earlier draft but is still waiting for a touch-up or two.
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Needless to say, if any of these ever appear in book form, as contributors you will be acknowledged! Each of you should send the name you would like to be known by to
Apparently, fellow punsters, I cannot include an e-mail address in these comments. If you scroll to the top of the original posts there's a "Contact" tab where you can reach me directly.
band of brassicas
knowledge of onions
cabinet of leeks
shoe of cabbages
hasness of beans
queue of peas
kith of pumpkin
These are all wonderful. What a great start to my week.
How about a shrink of sensitive plant?
Anyclot: how about a weeping of onions, or a plugging of leeks?
Julia: I'm sure there's something perfect for sensitive plant, but I'm still trying too & not quite there yet...
Maybe "a context of sensitive plants?"
This is a tricky one, isn't it Anthony? I keep trying things like "a hyper of..." or "an overly of..." or "a photo of...".
Still not there yet.
A few more (though they're not all puns ):
A charlie of Brazil nuts
A haiku of cherry blossoms
A fuzz of peaches
A buttery of parsnips
A herring-box of clementines
A house of oranges
A peep of pecans
A worry of dogwort
A shrink of violets
A ruff/frill of curly endive
An ear of cauliflowers
A rash of nettles
What fun. ABC Classic FM Breakfast in Australia asked for collective nouns for opera singers, but unfortunately I can't find the suggestions on their website. I think there was a chest of dames, and a decolletage of divas, but I can't remember accurately.
A friend sent me a link to your wonderful blog:)) What an addictive...sport you've discovered! How about:
a Sigh of Wisteria
a Howl of Lupines
a Fiddle of Ferns
a Longing of Pines
a Twist of Lemongrass
a Galaxy of Cosmos
and a great one my friend thought of:
a Calendar of Dates:))
(my mother is hooked now, too)
A gathering of moss.
A stool-pigeon of grass.
A trapping of firs.
A golightly of hollies.
I am that friend. Great game indeed!
Julia: I love"A fuzz of peaches," "A house of oranges,and "An ear of cauliflowers." We already have "A rash of Poison Ivy, but how about "A stinging of Nettles?"
yokohamamama: Not bad at all -- but
"A Galaxy of Cosmos" and"A Calendar of Dates" are just fantastic!
Daz: "A gathering of Moss[ses]" and "A golightly of Hollies" are delightful additions to the list.
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Please, all of you, e-mail me through the "Contact" tab at the top of the original post -- I'd love to credit all the people who have made such wonderful suggestion (in the event that a book is ever made of all these terms of venery -- or should I say "terms of vegery?"
What wonderful new additions from Yokohamamama and Daz.
How about a grasp of nettles?
A cesspool of bureaucrats?
Anonymous: Admittedly, some of our bureaucrats are practically vegetables... but that's not the kind we're talking about here.
The radio show, "A Way with Words," recently featured our collective terms. Google the individual show's title, "A Roberta of Flax" to listen to it.
The show's listeners have contributed many, many more examples via their comments on the website.
Yeah, I'm late to the party.
A column of rose(s)
A fordamerica of carnations
A kiss of tulips
A tandem of daisies
A crock of buttercups
A shiner of black-eyed susans
A matron of mums
A pupil of irises
A munster of lilies
A hubris of dandelions
A mnemonic of forget-me-nots
An erin of shamrocks
Better late than never, AppleJuiceFool!
BTW, we're currently working on a sequel to Terms of Vegery (obviously we are hindered by neither good taste nor ordinary shame).
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